Man vs. Nature

There is something innate about the human person that when we find ourselves face to face with nature we believe we can conquer it.  We believe we can win.  Maybe it is ego.  Maybe it is just human nature or more a “guy” thing.   Or maybe it is the result of the first fall.

Never the less, time and time again when we confront nature in its purest form we soon realize that we can never conquer that which is unmovable. Unconquerable.  That which is undefeated.

This is where I have found grace time and time again.

And it is also why I continue to confront it.

The humility that comes from challenging something that can’t be conquered unveils in it of itself the desire to compete in the first place.  And personally this is an important question to ask especially for an ex-athlete that thrives on competing, conquering, and winning.

For me, and I would guess for most ex-athletes, former teammates, and those whom I watch on TV today, you want to trigger that “competitive” nature in us, just tell them (us) you can’t.  Just tell us that you don’t think we can win.  Just taunt us with what we think our worth is.  Because rejection (losing) is our greatest fear.  A fear that is so deep that it quickly transforms itself into anger and aggression.

For the athletes that are currently playing on the field today, they can project this fear on every single opponent that wears a different jersey.  As a result, we hear things about the “drive” or the “edge” that many coaches use to describe the mentality of an athlete that wants to not only win but humiliate and rip the heart out of the opponent.  For many, this is simply a projection of their fear and thus anger.  It is about survival.

But for those who don’t play between the lines any longer, these triggers don’t just dissipate with our last game.  They show there heads in everyday life with nowhere to go.  No opponents to scapegoat.  No other teams to use for our therapy.

This is where confronting nature especially here in Switzerland has been so therapeutic.  It offers me a place to go when I feel that great fear within me getting triggered.  As I result, I turn my eyes to nature to compete when I feel rejected, used, or manipulated.  Knowing I will lose.  And losing helps me deal with what is.

My fear.