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Confessions of a Sports Parent: The Scoreboard
Happy New Year to you and your family. As the holidays have come and gone, and most of us are back into our routines, it can only mean one thing…back to driving our kids all over creation to their respective sporting events. As a result, I thought it would be fun to resume writing about the random thoughts I sometimes have while sitting on a sideline as a parent. This week, I find myself musing over a topic that always brings about a heated debate among parents and organizations. That is the debate surrounding the scoreboard. How important is it? What does it mean? Is it even needed? Is it…
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Confessions of a Sports Parent: Sports Wounds
(This is the second part of the series, it might be helpful to read the first here) We have all heard flight attendants say to adults and caregivers, especially parents, to be sure to apply your oxygen mask first before helping others. The thought, of course, is if you run out of oxygen yourself, you can’t help anyone else with theirs, especially children. That is a good image for me when I try to stay balanced as a sports parent. When I find myself out of balance, it usually happens when my old sports wounds, fears, or anxieties rear their ugly heads. I refer to these things as my shadows.…
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Confessions of a Sports Parent: Sports Balance
We know there is no rule book for those of us who are parents. We learn on the fly, with many cultural influences affecting our decisions and values. Not to mention our personal history, both positive and negative. Furthermore, for those of us who have children playing sports, the same premise exists…there isn’t a rule book, yet the same influences exist. Gone are the days of signing up at your local league, and you play a season for just that team alone. The rise of travel and specialization has changed the landscape of youth sports. As a result, most of us are trying to navigate an ever-changing world of youth…
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Two Choices
Watching my two boys climb rocks a few weeks ago in Maine brought a profound sense of gratitude and reflection. Grateful to be their father. Reflective because I tried to understand how they see the world, specifically me, as their father, something I must admit I rarely ever think about. As adults, our lives, rightly so, are filled with significant responsibilities, so it is difficult to stop and see the perspective that our children have towards us. As a parent, we do what we do, day in and day out, and rarely think about the impact our presence has on our children. We are the caregivers, the ones in charge,…
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Let’s Dance
I have not done much dancing of late. I’m afraid my days of getting down doing the running man or moonwalk have passed by. That said, I couldn’t help but dance this week to a different tune. There is no secret how these times have been mentally taxing for so many of us. No role, occupation, or vocation has been spared. This week, we got some bad news regarding the health of one of our sons. Nothing serious, but heartbreaking for him nonetheless, as it will most likely prevent him from participating in his favorite sport for the foreseeable future. A participation that has been so critical for the mental…
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Hard To Be Human
It’s well documented that the pandemic has brought to the surface many challenges for millions of people around the globe. Not only physical illness but loneliness and isolation have sparked a wave of mental illness as well. The pandemic has affected all of us in some way. Like so many things in life, although the struggles we face are felt by many, they are unique. In other words, our experiences and struggles are our own. The pandemic for us has been about navigating being home with two school-aged boys every day for almost a year. On the one hand, I have loved it because I know this is a time…
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A Stomping Joy
Watching my middle school-year-old boy wrestle with his desire for independence while at the same time finding comfort in boundaries is entertaining, to say the least. The meltdown over cleaning up a granola bar wrapper combined with the contentment of knowing what is expected of him is a fascinating thing to watch. I mean really, is it that upsetting to you that you are expected to throw the empty box of Pop-Tarts into the recycling bin instead of putting it back in the pantry? Which by the way, is right below you? Being his father, I have found the answer to those questions to be a resounding “YES!” Of course,…
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Perfectly Average
Without a doubt being a parent is one of the most rewarding and difficult vocations that there is. I think every parent knows this. This certainly isn’t anything new. It truly is self-giving. This is probably why it is so rewarding because it truly isn’t about you at the end of the day. As parents, we certainly get our daily reminders of that. (The once-a-month slight nods of appreciation from our kids before right back to not being able to put your dirty dishes in the dishwasher, WHAT IS THAT!!) I recently had a conversation with some parents about the idea of our kids being average. I remember the look…
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The Gray
For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be older. Maybe it comes from my tendency to avoid the present, or maybe it is a desire for what I view to be simpler times ahead. Either way, I often think about what my life might be like 30 to 40 years from now. Turning another year older over the weekend brought me physically closer to this reality, but it hasn’t extinguished the desire. In some ways, celebrating my birthday has only further ignited my passion for simplicity. A passion to be at peace within the gray. If we pay attention to our souls, growing older forces us…
